"Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure."- Oprah
The 1st Anniversary of Porshanality is here!
This day, last year, I decided to finally launch a blog after talking about it for nearly 5 years. My friends, my family, my colleagues all supported me in the decision to speak my mind by way of a blog.
But then... there was me. I fell off. After a few posts, I fell silent. My silence was out of fear. In fear of what people would say in response to my own truths, I made a conscious choice to stop writing. Truth be told, people can say some cruel things and I wasn't ready for the critical comments. After a few raw critiques by twitter trolls, I convinced myself to find truth in a lie: if I stay silent, the world would be a better place. I wouldn't be considered a troublemaker or an agitating voice if I stay silent.
And on this day, I can declare that the lie is bullshit.
I have something to say.
(S)aints, when we are silent, we aren't helping anyone. And we damn sure aren't helping ourselves by not speaking.
And so when I heard Auntie Maxine Waters declare that she was reclaiming her time to speak and to demand that her voice be heard and her questions be answered, I knew that I had to do something different.
I need to reclaim my space and my time from fear and self doubt.
It is my prayer that each of us do the same as it pertains to the thing that God is calling us to do. We deserve to reclaim our time. Our call beckons us to reclaim our time.
And so, on this year, I am recommitting myself to my writing and to my voice. For my anniversary post, I want to share with you some things that I know for sure.
1. No such thing as perfect timing. Why do I say that? Because perfection is an illusion and time is the one thing that is sure to move. So, essentially, waiting for the perfect time is a waste of time.
2. Planning is essential. While there is no such thing as perfect timing, there is such thing as planning. We can plan in pencil the things that we desire to do and work towards it.
3. Manage your money. Your future and your bank account will thank you for these things.
4. It's ok to treat yourself... and by "treat," I really mean invest. We must invest in ourselves. This can be in the form of a massage, a date night alone, seeing a financial advisor, and even going to see a therapist. We need to take care of ourselves in ways that aren't taxing, but relaxing.
5. Get your tail on a couch... not your couch. The couch of the psychologist. Your mental health matters. We all need to process our "inner me" with a professional. Life is hard. It was never intended to be easy. That's why God calls people to the profession of the mind that we might be made whole in MIND, body and spirit.
6. Friendships are fragile, but they are also intentional. Friendships are hard enough. I learned that in order to be faithful to the few that I have, I must be intentional about calling and spending time with them, regardless of location.
7. When it comes to failed friendships and relationships, wish the other party well. This is my favorite line of all time. I don't say goodbye to people I no longer wish to speak to, but I do wish them all the best in life. In many cases, I genuinely mean it. Just because it is not in the will of life for folks to be in conversation, relationship, or communication, does not mean that we are supposed to treat people wrong in the end. I've learned this: Don't burn bridges.. Just know when it's time to cross to the other side and then build a toll.
8. Stamina in our 20s don't last always. Take care of your body. What we eat matters. How much we move, or don't move, matters. Drink water, exercise, get sleep. Moisturize your skin. Repeat.
9. God is ABLE. But seriously. God is Able. The older I get, the more I live. The more I live, the more I see that God makes good on the promise to never leave nor forsake. God is more real to me now than ever before.
These things, I know for sure.
And (s)aints, there's more to come...